Friday, June 10, 2011

How the things are going here

Well, two months have passed since the birth of my youngest treasure, Olivia Ann and the road has been rocky to say the least. Mostly, even though I knew that raising three children, 12-year-old, one-year old and an infant would be difficult, I really had no idea how hard it would turn out to be. The household seems to be in a total state of chaos and to top it off, I have been going through what I feared the most: Postpartum Depression. Since I struggled with depression for most of my life, I should have expected this to happen. Just deep down I hoped it wouldn't.


But there is a silver lining to every cloud and I have been blessed with great people who had my best interest in heart. Especially my midwife who finally made me go and see a psychiatrist, my sister who has been a great support and my wonderful husband, who's been through hell and back with me but still stays by me and is very understanding (I love you very much hon, if you're reading it).


So far, it's working great and I have much hope for getting this awful depression under control.

All this is not to say that I don't enjoy the angels I have now to love and who love me. Aleksander is being such a good little brother (even though he has his moments of naughtiness), he gives Olivia kisses and helps me throw the diapers away and really is just a bundle of love. The funniest thing is when he tries to do things Olivia does, such as climbing into her bassinet.


My oldest girl, Karolina, is really a trooper and doesn't complain a thing about the mess, the noise and her little brother being a tiny pain in the butt :)



Miss Timmins' School for Girls: A NovelOn the reading front, my depression problems understandably slowed everything down and my plans for reading and reviewing certain books have to be pushed to a further date. I am however in process of reading Miss Timmins' School for Girls by Nayana Currimbhoy, courtesy of NetGalley and I'm really liking it. It's a mixture of coming-of-age and murder mystery and I think it would appeal to a wide range of readers. Full review will be hopefully coming soon.

Another thing that will be coming soon is my rant about a recent article from The New York Review of Books (June 23rd edition), 'The Epidemic of Mental Illness' by Marcia Angell. All I have to say right now, the books mentioned in there and a somewhat vague opinion of the article author are FULL OF CRAP. Stay tuned for what will probably be a post with a few expletives, I just have to read it again to make sure I got it right.

I swear, this girl can put a smile on even the grumpiest person's face.

16 comments:

  1. She's beautiful! I'm so glad you were able to get help. I experienced moderate depression after the birth of each of my children, but while I'm in the midst of it, I don't really realize what's going on. I don't know if that's normal or not, but looking back, I wish someone would have pushed me to get some help, because I couldn't help myself.
    Good luck and enjoy those baby smiles!

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  2. Thank you Shelley. It's definitely difficult to go through all the changes we as mother do especially when depression is in the picture as well. Personally, it saddens me how many women go on without help and suffer alone. I hope you're doing better now.

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  3. Awwwww, my heart warms when I look at her. What a wonderful child.

    But I am sorry for what you have to go through *hugs*. I am glad you have great people around you to help

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  4. Thank you for the hugs and nice words, Linda. I appreciate it a lot.

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  5. She is an angel!

    I am glad that you are feeling better....depression is awful, as I suffer with it too. I will be on medication for the rest of my life, but if that is what it takes, then so be it. You have a lovely family, Lilly...have a wonderful weekend!

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  6. So be it indeed, Missy :) I haven't wanted to be on medication for the longest time and just went from one therapist to another with no improvement. It took postpartum depression to finally get my butt to a psychiatrist and the medication is working and if I have to take it forever that's fine with me because I feel like I may finally have my life back.

    Thank you for your kind words about my family :)

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  7. What a beautiful and precious little baby!!

    I hope things continue to go well for you and your family.

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  8. I love the picture of Olivia sacked out on her daddy. Too cute! It sounds like things are starting to look up for you...I'll send good thoughts your way!

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  9. Olivia is adorable! You have beautiful children, Lily and I love the pics you posted..

    I'm sorry you are dealing with post partum depression but I'm glad you have a good support system around you and are getting the help you need. Just take a deep breathe.

    I am also reading Miss Timmins' School for Girls and enjoying it!

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  10. Sorry to hear about the depression. I hope you see happier days ahead. :)

    I'm right there with you though. My son was born Apr. 25th. I couldn't be happier except that I'm going back to work on the 20th. :(

    I too haven't had too much time to read but it's getting easier.

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  11. So sorry to hear that you've been suffering but it sounds like you really have a great support system and are on the right track. Your children are so adorable!

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  12. She's gorgeous! Sorry you're going through a rough spot right now, but I admire your courage for talking about your experiences with PPD. You have a wonderful supportive family, and I know they'll be there to help you through it all.

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  13. Oh, what sweet baby pics! She's precious!

    I am really very sorry about the depression. But I'm glad you have such a supportive family and network of doctors. {[hugs}}

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  14. Great to see you back - And oh my - you are blessed - she's stunning. Its great to hear you have the support of loved ones during this difficult time. I have bipolar disorder and Ive done IVF twice - failed - will do it again and finally next year - but I do worry I'll suffer from PPB's too. My younger sister did with her first. It's a terrible thing. Get well soon.
    Shah @
    http://wordsinsync.blogspot.com/2011/06/short-story-someone-special.html

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  15. Aww Lilly, absolutely gorgeous photos of all your kiddies but especially little Olivia, what a smile. I'm smiling looking at her lol.

    As a fellow medication taker for depression I applaud your courage in taking that big step, I don't care if I'm on medication for the rest of my life. It's challenging but not impossible to drag yourself out of the black hole and if medication and wonderful support people can aide you on the journey then knowing when to say yes is half the battle.

    I tell my son who also suffers with depression, "how is it any different than needing insulin for diabetes or medication for high blood pressure". It's not.

    Hugs from across the miles.

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